Topknots and Travels

Friday the 13th. I’m living on a total of two hours of sleep. Surviving on coffee. I’m leaving for Europe TODAY. As I type this, I’m sitting in an airport terminal. I’ve decided to wait to write this post until it feels real enough. First stop- London. I’ll be exploring Europe on my own for around a month! Whenever I tell that to people, they freak out. Even my parents have seen the movie Taken one too many times. I feel so many things in this moment- anxiety, bliss, euphoria; I can’t stop smiling. How did this happen? How am I able to live this amazing life? This is too much. I decided to travel this summer a long time ago. (Literally years.) I’m about to transition into a huge part of my life. I’m moving out in August. To my favorite city in Kansas. I’m at a point where I’m making huge, life-changing decisions, and I just feel the need to do some soul searching- go on a life-changing trip to match. I’m ready to learn how to put myself out there and overcome these anxieties I have been living with for so long. I need to learn the right way to live in the present. I need to experience. I’m so READY to take control of my life and really LIVE it. I can’t begin to explain how wanderlusty I am. I’m such a travel cliché. Why would anybody want to live an average life? I am curious by nature, and I can’t wait to explore this beautiful planet I’ve been placed on by some miracle of the universe. This is finally an opportunity for me to retain new energy and inspiration and my own being. I chose to go alone so I can get the most out of this journey. I want to journal in coffee shops, see the sights through my own eyes, and do what I want, when I want. People don’t want to be alone, naturally. Maybe it’s because they don’t want to face themselves. But that’s the only way to realize who you truly are…… by being alone. My desires are experiences rather than objects, which is an odd thing coming from a fashion blogger who goes by the domain name of “Vanity-Laced.” I don’t want to travel, I need to. I only feel like myself when I’m living out of a suitcase, planning, and improvising. None of this has felt real yet. I don’t think it’s really going to kick in until I’m walking the streets of London, honestly. One of my friends also happens to be independently traveling Europe right NOW as well?!?! I’ve stressed so much about this trip and he’s actually helped me sort out my mentality about this trip in ways I wish I could put into words. (I don’t think he even realizes it lol.) it’s just comforting to know that somebody out there from my tiny Kansas town has the same mindset as I do and is making the same mistakes right now. I will try and keep you all updated as much as possibly. I’m looking forward to sharing these moments with you all. I’m not sure what to expect, but I’m tired of trying to imagine. I will land and my mind is going to explode. I don’t care what happens on this trip, which is something most people can’t grasp. I WILL get lost. I will make American tourist mistakes. But I will learn, I will watch my own ego dissolve, and I will evolve. This shirt has every single one of my intentions on it. I couldn’t summarize this situation any better. Remember, you can be a light absolutely ANYWHERE. Treat everyday as if you were on a life-altering journey, because in this moment, you ARE.

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